Watch the video of this birth here.

I went into labor around 3am on Monday morning. I’d had maybe 3 or 4 contractions in the previous 6 hours but nothing very different from what I’d been feeling for weeks. Despite a feeling that labor might be coming soon it took me awhile to wrap my head around the fact that this baby was, indeed, going to come a good week or two earlier than I thought possible.

Colin was up working until midnight and then I asked him to do a few things before going to bed. I told him I’d let him sleep unless I really needed him if he’d only finish the last few ‘to do’s. He asked if I was having regular contractions and I told him no. He asked if we were having a baby the next day and I shrugged and told him ‘Maybe tonight.’ He didn’t look all too pleased considering he’d been working all week and had yet to sleep!

He went to bed around 2:30 and I kind of sat in the living room trying to figure out what to do with myself. I’d tried going to sleep before but had been nursing Huck down and had a contraction that was too uncomfortable to stay lying down.

So I started making a super brew of Red Raspberry Leaf tea (which is suppose to be drunk during labor) and sat on the birth ball emailing and journaling. I actually emailed a friend telling her I’d had a few contractions but didn’t know if this was it so we could tentatively plan to meet for lunch on Wednesday!

Around 3AM contractions started more frequently but were still mild and a little erratic. I was, to be honest, more than a little grumpy to be starting labor without having slept.

Around 4AM I started trying to drink the RRL tea but only got half of it down before I ran to the bathroom and threw it all up! Yuck! I noticed the contractions were a little stronger and started walking and dancing around the living room trying to get my head in the game.

I’d spent the last few weeks reading the birth stories in Ina May’s Guide To Childbirth and there were quite a few that resonated with me. I had made it my goal to see what this birth could be like if I actively worked during labor to recognize and deal with fear, if I focused on what was joyful and pleasurable and to channel the sensations and my thought process through a more positive place.

So I gave myself a pep talk and admitted that this was early labor and that I needed some company to lift my mood. I recognized that I was already thinking about how much I don’t like crowning (I don’t!) and that I was worrying about what was coming instead of just focusing on now. So I did some self talk and then called my doula, Lacey, and tried really hard to sound cheerful. (I have no idea whether that worked or not, I know I probably sounded grouchy and needy, lol).

As soon as I hung the phone up I felt better to know she was on her way. Immediately the contractions kicked it up a notch and I knew I needed to call my midwife, Kristy (and that she would call the other midwife, Joyce). I knew once I had talked to her and she was on her way that things were going to move fast and I could let go and hand myself over to the process. So I called her and tried to sound cheerful (I probably just sounded apologetic and uncertain, lol) and when I hung up I felt soooo much better and was able to begin to move my focus inward.

They arrived and things went pretty much like I had imagined they would. I was 2cms and contractions were coming regularly and strong. I labored on the bed and then on the birth ball with Kristy and Lacey offering support and responding like mind readers to my needs.

I felt so centered and confident in my body with this birth. I focused on how good the contractions felt after the peak and could actually feel my cervix opening- it was pretty amazing! When I thought I’d felt my cervix open more I checked myself and told Kristy I was at a 4 now and that baby’s head was still acynclitic.

I knew I was going to need the pool soon so I woke Colin up around 6ish and he got to work getting it set up (and overcoming huge unplanned obstacles!).

As soon as they said the pool was ready I high tailed it into the kitchen and jumped in between contractions. I think I only labored for another 30 or 45 minutes before I felt that huge energy surge and my body gave an involuntary push. I told Lacey I was losing the feeling in my face and legs (a nerve response I’ve had in all my labors) because we’d talked about it before and how much I didn’t like that sensation.

My body was giving a push every few contractions but it HURT and not in the right way. I started blowing through the contractions and it helped immensely. I checked myself and realized I couldn’t be more than a 6- just like I’d experienced with Huck’s birth. Instead of fighting the pushing I just tried to keep doing horse lips and stay relaxed to let my body finish dilating.

This was working fine until baby’s heart rate dropped. I’d been so inwardly focused that I hadn’t really communicated to anyone that I still had a big cervical lip and that baby’s head was still high. They naturally assumed I’d been pushing all this time and began encouraging me to get down to business and push baby out.

At this point I don’t remember very well everything that happened. I knew heart tones were very low and I ran through the options in my head. I knew transfer was futile at this point and that the best thing was to get baby out fast. I knew that baby was still high, I had a bulging bag of waters and I wasn’t complete but that I would be soon. I was also trying to re-engage the part of my brain that was able to convert this knowledge to words and communicate it to everyone else!

There were hands everywhere and it was a little chaotic. I know I barked answers to questions, refused to get out of the water, swatted at people’s hands and commandeered the doppler at some point. They were so patient to work with me when I was refusing their experienced suggestions and unable to communicate clearly.

At some point the contractions arrested and I tried to push anyway. That was a big, fat NO! It was like pushing against a brick wall. So I waited and then I think the contractions started again. I pushed back the lip and felt his head pretty much drop down to crowning . My body REALLY started to push and I focused on getting him out as quickly as possible without shooting him across the room (which I honestly think I could have done!).

He came flying out at 7:46A- born in the caul! I was able to catch him myself and he was born pink and breathing well! Everything had gone so fast I couldn’t believe what time it was when they told me. Millie got to tell everyone he was a boy and we waited for the cord to stop pulsating and then Colin cut the cord, separating us and releasing him into the world!

I can’t say how amazing it was to have everyone I love near by, especially with how intense this birth was. Millie was giving me smiles and telling me how good I was doing while Huxley stood by offering me pretend cups of tea and doing ‘horse lips’ right along with me. Colin was near by and I could sense his presence even when I couldn’t see him. My midwives and doula were a constant source of reassurance and comfort. I love them all immensely and couldn’t imagine having done it without them!